Don’t Worry: 420

Did you forget it was 4/20? Don’t worry, we didn’t—that’s why this was almost published late!

April 20, 2017
How’s yo' 420 goin so far? Did yo dirty ass start yo' celebrations wit a wake-n-bake. What’s tha past tense of wake-n-bake, dawg? Wake-n-baked? Woke-n-baked? Woke-n-boke?

Well, even if you missed yo' breakfast bong hit, it’s never too late ta big-up wit tha myriad of combustiblez (buds ’n dabs), decarboxylatizablez (wax ’n oil), n' ediblez available nowadays—speakin of which, we shizzle could go fo' a Cali High Thai'd Ice Cream bout now, nahmeean, biatch?

Five fun 420 facts:
- Da sayin 420 came bout up in 1971 when a funky-ass bunch of pot tokin lil playas from San Rafael High School up in California, aka "Da Waldos", needed a cold-ass lil code fo' tokin up fo' realz. As they regularly kicked it at tha campus statue of Louis Pasteur at 4:20pm ta git high, rockin "420" as a cold-ass lil code pimped naturally.
- Although tha thang was invented up in Africa, tha word "bong" is derived from tha Thai word ‘baung,’ which means ‘a cylindrical wooden tube, pipe, or container made of bamboo.’ It be tha only word up in English dat is derived from tha Thai language—know that shit.
- No otherwise healthy thug has eva took a dirt nap as a result of ingestin da sticky-icky-icky; tha number directly attributed ta da bambalacha is fewer than by shark attack.
- Da fiber made from tha stalkz of tha hemp plant (a strain of tha dat fuckin' phat shiznit sativa plant dat gotz nuff less than 0.1% of tha actizzle sticky-icky-icky THC) has a myriad of industrial uses n' was once used ta produce tha vast majoritizzle of tha planet’s paper, rope, n' fabric (Da United States’ Declaration of Independence was freestyled on hemp n' tha straight-up OG Levis jeans was made of hemp too).
Ganja, bambalacha, purple urkle, mary jane: Over tha centuries, da sticky-icky-icky n' its derivatives done been called by almost as nuff names as there now is strainz of tha plant (we’ve come a long-ass way from Thai Stick n' Da Chronic). Scientists from Amsterdam ta Tokyo, Colorado ta California done been bustin hybrid, crossbreed strainz of species found all over tha ghetto. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Some of da most thugged-out strains nowadays are Girlscout Cookies, Green Crack, David Banner, Sour Deisel, Durban Poison, Kosher Kush, Tangerine Power, Banana Kush, and Blue Dream, tha dopest pushin sativa-dominant hybrid up in Colorado.

But what’s tha chronic called in otha spots, biatch? Maybe you’re biggin' up 420 up in Sweden n' you don’t gotz a reliable deala there. How tha fuck do you know what tha fuck ta ask for, biatch? Here is some terms fo' chronic round tha werld world: Afghanistan: Chars, Brazil: Camarão, South Africa: Dagga, Middle-East: Kif, India: Maal, Trinidad: Grade, Puerto Rico: Pasto, and Hawaii: Pakalolo.

So, wherever yo ass is at on 420, don’t forget ta big-up right son! Ganja is phat fo' yo' body, its phat fo' yo' soul, n' it make everytin irie fo' realz. As Bob Marley once holla'd: “Love the life you live. Live the life you love.”